Be RHOyal.... Be a Queen!!

Queen: A woman eminent in power or attractions; the highest of her kind; as, a queen in society; -- also used figuratively of cities, countries, etc. a woman, or something personified as a woman, that is foremost or preeminent in any respect

I love all Ladies independent or not but regardless if a chick is paying her own bills, her baby daddy is, or her sugar daddy is plenty of us (yes US) have a lot to learn about being a Queen. Especially when it comes to dating and relationships. You ask a woman what she wants out of a relationship be it marriage or just a dating relationships and she tells yous all that she wants her man to do for her. To often females are wrapped up in what they want out of a partner they never get around to what they can give. You cannot get a King if you are not a Queen.

What do YOU as a women have to offer a man? Do you make the grade on several levels? Physically: your looking for Will Smith/Morris Chestnut but you keep a sloppy appearance? Mentally: You want an Einstein and you don't care to strengthen your own mind? It may not be a muscle but it still needs to exercise! Emotionally: You want someone without drama but your still holding on to that break-up in 3rd grade when you got dumped for the girl that ate paste? Personality: You want someone whose insides are excessively awesome yet you lack the capacity to excel past your inner beauty. Spiritually: You want a God-fearing/loving man but can't remember the last time you stepped inside a Church much less opened your bible and soaked up God's Word. To often females aren't worthy of the men they seek. If you want to get a King you need to focus on becoming a Queen.

Physical beauty is something that can only be affirmed by whoever is looking. What look good to Mike may not look good to Paul. But I think that there are some overall things that every Queen should strive for: (1) Take care of your skin. Light/dark or a Brownin be mindful of your skin. Wash your face regularly and try to avoid dark spots. Drink lots of water to keep it hydrated. Also use good products to keep your skin soft. I haven't met a man yet that appreciates tough/rough skin. (2) Wear your weight well. Whether your a size 0 or a 26 somebody is interested. Whatever you weigh you need to wear your clothes well. Buy close that fit YOU not your favorite actress or recording star. It may look good on the mannequin but look disastrous on you. (3) Be Healthy. Regardless of what you weigh be mindful of your own body. At 25/35 or even 45 you shouldn't get winded or achy after going up a flight of steps! NO BUENO. Exercise and eat right it can only help.

Mental stimulation is something everyone is interested in on some level. Regardless of age you should always remain teachable. Being out of school is no reason NOT to renew your mind. College may not be for everyone but neither is ignorance. Pick up a book, take a class, turn on the history channel! I know the news can be depressing at times but you should always be informed on current events. Knowing more about what department store has a sale this week than the going ons of your city/state/country is NOT cute. And be mindful of who you drop that "I don't do reading" line on. Its a turn-off for me personally.

Emotionally you have to make sure you are in shape. Holding on to baggage that hinders you is not a good look. Romantic relationships aren't the only ones that leave baggage. Get over your mommy issues, your daddy issues, your color complex, and your self-esteem killers. You need to be whole as a person before you even attempt to seriously date someone. You cannot be a Queen if you are hardened by bitterness, regret, pain, etc. Open your mouth and talk to someone or get a journal and get it all out. There is nothing wrong with seeking professional help. Purge yourself of all the negative energy that is either lying dormant or running amok in your life.

Personality is BIG. Make sure you are portraying the kind of characteristics that are royal. Character is very important. It is the essence of who you are. You can be a quiet person or a very sociable person but you still want to be of good character. Be humble, respectful, and always walk in love. Know your strengths and weaknesses. Just because you are a Queen it doesn't mean you are perfect. It just means you are perfect in your imperfections. When you know who you are others will want to know you as well.

Spirituality is complex. If you are interested in meeting someone who is a God-fearing man then you need to be someone who would be the kind of person they would be interested in. Showing up at Church every Sunday is not the end all be all. You can sit through an entire service not soaking in the word but taking in the sights wearing a outfit that would make the devil himself blush. Jesus should be your first love. When you get to know our God you truly find out who YOU are. Read your bible, pray, meditate on the Word. Praise and Worship God for all he has done for you. A good friend of mine said Prayers go up and Blessings come down. You'd be surprised who and what you become blessed with.

All in all each one of these attributes should be something you want for yourself. Be recognized as the Queen you are and be treated as such. But the first person to treat you royally is yourself. No one will respect you if you don't care to respect yourself. Again: ONLY a Queen is good enough for a King. If you want to be with Court Jesters/Dukes/Earls by all mean keep half stepping. But if you expect a King BE a Queen.