"I don't care if he was there this afternoon!! He comes home to me err-nite cause I'M his baby you just some two bit ho!e. He don’t care about yo stank @$$. That is MY man he loves me! I don’t want you in my house no more and don't be calling my house phone no more either you tr!ck!! I got caller ID!!"
As homegirl snaps her cell shut with an indignant snap I can't help but think: 'Ahhhhhh the joys of riding Public Transportation'. Even with the upcoming fare hike this Brooklyn Beauty still finds reasons to ride the MTA besides making it to work. Reasons that make her feel a tad better about the $2 she spends for horrible service. Its truly amazing the small joys you get. You can get molested by a homeless person for free when it’s crowded, a concert, a dance recital. Have you ever seen the midget Michael Jackson impersonator who frequents the 34Th and 14Th street stations? Seriously you get a ride, a show and sometimes even a revelation. Today’s revelation: I have no intention of being any body's #1,2,3, etc.
Here me out for a moment. I’m a middle child (I’ve been told this alone can have you pre-approved to be crazy) and a self proclaimed Eccentric Old Lady in training but I cannot understand why anyone would settle for being some one's #2 much less #3. Who wants anybody’s sloppy 2Nd's? Excuse me but I'm selfish when it comes to what 'belongs' to me. And if you’re going to label me your 'Lady', Boo, Girl, Mami, Night Nurse, etc. and your my man then as far as I'm concerned no one else should be able to reap those benefits. Quite frankly, if I'm anywhere near dabbling in your stuff and we are not a couple I don't want another chick doing so as well. I know that is something I cannot control but a girl can dream. But outside of not wanting to find out from Maury who is NOT the father Statistics have shown me enough sh*t is running around in people's pants these days that I've taken a vow of celibacy. But I digress that's an entry for another time.
A good friend of mine who happens to be a single black male disagrees. As far as he is concerned he is able to get the best of both worlds. He gets sex and he can leave the relationship drama for the girl’s man. He has no qualms about being a chick’s #2 or even #3. But when I flip it he made it very clear that it wouldn't sit right with him being #1 for someone who has a #2 and/or 3. It wouldn’t matter if he was out on his own doing dirt. **Flashes of the scene in the Best Man when Morris Chestnuts beats the snot out of Taye Diggs run through my head** It boggles my mind the way some dudes can mess around so much and become so territorial when it’s THEIR woman. Please don’t get me wrong I know a number of females who prefer this lifestyle as well.
I on the other hand can't say I’d be satisfied being #2 or 3. But worst than being someone’s 2 or 3 is that indignant idiot #1. As far as I’m concerned walking around knowing your with someone who has many other someone’s and being ok with it because you have a label/ring is even worse. Walking around with a smug look on your face like a Cheshire cat when you won a boobie prize. I cannot wrap my mind around this phenomenon. Maybe in my younger days.... No not even then.
I on the other hand can't say I’d be satisfied being #2 or 3. But worst than being someone’s 2 or 3 is that indignant idiot #1. As far as I’m concerned walking around knowing your with someone who has many other someone’s and being ok with it because you have a label/ring is even worse. Walking around with a smug look on your face like a Cheshire cat when you won a boobie prize. I cannot wrap my mind around this phenomenon. Maybe in my younger days.... No not even then.
As I exit the bus shaking my head, squeezing between the homeless woman who smelled as though she hadn’t showered in three weeks and the young professional who had been making googily eyes at me I take in the full scope of my $2 revelation. I can't settle for #3, #2, or even #1. Call me selfish, call me crazy, call me an idealist but the only slot I'm willing to fill is the ONLY 1.
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